Teenage Love Relationship We have spoken in the past of how, if we take an 'adult' approach to what might be called romance relationships (I use the term loosely), love can seem childish or even meaningless. But there are reasons why one partner may find a romantic relationship with another – for example, a mother who sees her child playing as she walks home from school and wants to keep them company whilst they do so; both parents wanting to spend time together outside their marriage at weekends due that such things become more frequent now but would prefer not to get too involved because it will affect all aspects going forward - whether he/she feels like becoming engaged late The prospect of your teen beginning to date is of course unnerving. It is easy to fear your child getting hurt, getting in over their head, being manipulated or heartbroken, and particularly, growing up and leaving the nest. But as uncomfortable or scary as it may feel to think about your child with a r
" I am terrified of this dark thing that sleeps in me; All day,
I feel its soft feathery turnings"
When you think of dark behavior, you would be forgiven for thinking that it only applies to any crime that lands you on the front page of the dailies or becomes a feature-length film on the crime channel. In reality, it also includes quite a number of things that have generally become socially acceptable even if we do not condone such behavior personally. We witness these actions in our homes, schools, offices and thanks to innovative technology, we now see it on the internet. To help you get a clearer picture and hopefully a deeper understanding of this subject and to tell you how close to home these actions are, I am going to share with you some of the most sensational crimes stories and the seemingly inconsequential actions the led to a terrible end.
CASE STUDY ONE
News: Brutal Murder of a 14-year-old boy Traits of the Perpetrator: Controlling, Abusive, Manipulative, Reclusive Channel: Online Gaming This was the tragic story of a young boy from a well-grounded home.
He had the same privileges of any teenager in the same age and social group. He had a supportive mom and a dad who strived to provide. His mother took all the necessary precautions a mother would to protect her boy from the invasive world of the internet. Online gaming was just another thing any teenage boy would indulge in. As long as he didn’t spend more than the appropriate time on it, he should be fine. But the perpetrator who was only 4 years older had sinister plans. By carefully manipulating his young and impressionable victim with lies, he tricked the boy into visiting him at his place where he committed the vicious crime. It was one of the most disturbing cases. Especially when you consider the age of the victim and the perpetrator. However, regardless of his age, the perpetrator exhibited all the predatory traits linked to dark psychology and snuffed out life just to assert control.
CASE STUDY TWO
News: Worst Domestic Violence Case Traits of the Perpetrator: Physically Abusive, Manipulative, Controlling Channel: Relationship Love indeed is a beautiful thing. When you enter into a relationship with someone, you enter with the hopes that this person would love and care for you. That you would nurture and protect each other. In the modern love language, it is you and the person against the world. And indeed, it started out this way in this relationship. A single mom working hard to care for and provide for her son met this charming man who was basically what she had always prayed for in a man.
He was charming, considerate and seemed to love her boy just as much as he loved her. In order to fully make himself available for this young family, he quit his job and devoted himself to caring for her until his true dark nature emerged. Using her love for her family, he manipulated her into isolating herself from those closest to her. He orchestrated the loss of her job which resulted in the loss of her home. This ensured that she was entirely dependent on him. He relocated her to his own apartment where she was constantly subjected to round the clock torture that involved some of the most inhumane treatments. His careful manipulation of the woman as so effective that when he gave her the option of how she would like to be killed, she actually mulled the thought over because she felt she had no choice and deserved no better. Chance and an act of bravery on her part led to her rescue and incarceration of the perpetrator.
CASE STUDY THREE
News: A prominent Minister of God accused of molesting underaged members Traits of the Perpetrator: Manipulative, controlling, egocentric Channel: Religion There is a sacred relationship between religious leaders and their followers.
The leader is meant to be the moral compass that directs the followers in the right way to lead their lives. For years, regardless of religion, leaders have abused their position of power choosing instead to play out the biblical reference to the proverbial sheep and shepherd role. Except, instead of being shepherds, they choose to be wolves. Having established his authenticity by claiming to have direct communication with God, this religious leader conned his members with his vision. At some point, he proclaimed himself God and claimed he had a mandate to sleep with 7 virgins who also happened to be minors. He was later charged to court and convicted of the crime.
These three cases here are sensational but the lesson is what I want to call your attention to. These crimes were not random, spur of the moment type of crimes. It involved careful orchestration that groomed the victims and pulled them in that false state of trust and safety before they struck. As a matter of fact, the way the events played out brings to mind the role play between a predator and its prey. First, the victim is stalked and observed. Then based on the information obtained during the observation process, the predator makes a move. Only this move is not to strike but to charm their prey. Make them feel loved and cared for. It is like they wear a mask and portray characteristics that they know appeal to their victims. Gradually, trust is established.
The next goal is to get their prey to depend on them. Whether it is financial dependence, emotional dependence or spiritual dependence, the outcome is the same. They want to feel needed. Then they isolate their prey, after which, they strike. It is never like those crimes that you suspect or see coming a mile away. It is like a song and dance routine that give the predator the upper hand and leaves the victim vulnerable. In the next chapter, we will discuss just how vulnerable we are
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